She wouldn’t listen to me. ‘I’m telling you, she said, the New Orleans Saints 2018 NFC South Division Champions Fair Catch shirt of the pumpkins lives in the middle of the woods and the woods that he lives in are the woods right next to our house, the woods you can see out of the window over there. She pointed with her hand to the woods that were, in fact, just outside the window behind our house. He doesn’t live in a field like the other pumpkins, continued mother, ‘because he’s not an ordinary pumpkin. He’s the King Pumpkin.’I shut up and decided to believe her, like you do when you’re a kid. Firstly, I knew that it wasn’t worth arguing with my mother. She always won.
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Secondly, when you’re a New Orleans Saints 2018 NFC South Division Champions Fair Catch shirt kid, you always believe what grown-ups tell you, no matter how stupid it is. Like Santa Claus and stuff like that. Kids always believe it, even though they know it’s stupid.Mother often talked nonsense, I have to say that. There was the time she told me that the moon was made of cheese. I knew that was nonsense. Then there were all the stories she told me. Stories about frogs, princesses, princes and shoes. Stories about donkeys and unicorns, gnomes and elves, magic mirrors and magic cooking pots. Stories about why the stars are exactly the way they are, why the river that runs through our town has the name that it has, stories about where the sun comes from, why the sky is so far away and why the elephant has a long trunk.